Friday, 22 January 2010

Twilight, Teen plight.

So apparently Stephenie Meyer came up with the idea for the whole Twilight thing in a dream. That sure was one very good nights sleep. For her that is. For the rest of the world-well that depends on your view I guess.

I finished reading the saga a while ago and I have to admit, I was hooked. Being quite a bookworm with few friends and too much time on my hands it wasn't that difficult to allow myself to really get my teeth into it (If you dislike vampire puns, I suggest you stop reading now). Although the dreamy prose and repetitve over-use of some vocabulary did make me want to vomit at times, the rainy setting of Forks did somehow manage to successfully blur the line between myth and reality, making the story itself quite engrossing. Of course, being a girl, I was probably more "into it" than your average toilet-seat-leaver-upper as it played up to every plain Jane's dream of being loved by the perfect boyfriend.

Lets just take a quick look at (the much lusted after) Edward Cullen's credentials here:
-Increadibly handsome. "Heart-stoppingly" so.
-Immortal. Never gets old, wrinkly or beer bellied.
-Super Strength and speed.
-Love's the female character (Bella) absoultely unconditionally.
-MEGA rich.

This minor problem hasn't put anyone off though. Bella didn't even "bat" an eyelid, and so scurries off with the undead and it all ends rather happilly. As these things generally do. The problem was, the whole time I was reading the book, I couldn't help but feel that it was just some middle-aged woman's fantasy gone wild.

She probably just received one of those spam e-mails advertising hormone replacement therapy, or silk-lined coffins, and so whilst blotting away her "im old and unattractive" tears, wished of how things could be in her fantasies. So she went away and created a world where there's no need for anti-wrinkle cream or diets. Luckily for her, 90% of females also look for the above PROS in a man, and so they all went out and bought the book so as to relive the fantasy themselves. This is a good thing for Stephenie Meyer's bank account, but jeez, are women becoming so idealistic about men that they're never going to be satisfied until an actual prince comes bounding in on his horse to rescue them from desk daydreams and disastrous dating?

If that is true, then normal blokes don't stand a chance really, do they? Not that any fairy tales have ever helped on that front. Disney's got a lot to answer for too. All this expectation and idolising of future husbands leads to a huge dissapointment in the end in most cases. But who's fault is that? Is it women, for being stupid to believe that crap, or men for not living up to that crap, or the writers, like Stephenie Meyer, for writing that crap in the first place??? Has this woman single-handedly doomed a generation of teenage boys to never getting laid????

To be fair, she's a Christian, so a generation of people not getting laid is probably exactly what she intended.

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